Shady happenings in Fayette County

So I took a little kayacking trip along the Yough yesterday and was shocked to discover a few dirty little secrets that the folks in Fayette County were keeping from the rest of us. I guess this shouldn't be too surprising, after all most of the county was originally purchased by a diabolical army officer who swindled his own soldiers out of land awarded them by the King of England. This villain took advantage of the economic woes of his now unemployed soldiers and was able to buy the property off them for pennies an acre. The Bloodthirsty Monster's name?...... George Washington.


Ok on to some new revelations

-I want to take this opportunity to officially make a Declaration of Shenanigans against Citgo Bassmaster Classic Fishing Tournament. Normally I wouldn't waist a second thinking about "The Bassmaster Classic" but since their holding it on the Pittsburgh rivers this year the TV is polluted with bass fishen advertisements. While we were on the river yesterday we noticed there were far too many fish and that they were all enormous. Those bastards are cheating! No wonder those overweight hillbillies on the TV fishing show always catch monsters that look like they've spent a some time floating around Three Mile Island. The Television Fishing Industry is stocking ringer fish !


- A little farther down the river we ran into a site more disturbing ( I know what could be more disturbing than deceitful television fisherman?). Try to wrap your head around this one boys and girls. As we entered the final stretch of our trip I noticed more and more people along the river banks in one particularly large group that had taken up residence on both sides of the river (and near my favorite rope swing into the river) we spotted a large middle-aged man with a giant swastika tattooed on his back. That's right you heard it here first folks, Peryolopous Pennsylvania is the favored vacation spot of the neo-nazi community of America.

So I guess I'll finish this with a little advice. Next time your in search of some aquatic enjoyment in the Youghiogheny valley. Just spend the extra 15 minutes in the car and go to Ohiopyle instead. I think you be a little less likely to find genetically altered fish floating around the rapids of Dimple Rock. Plus I've never seen a member of the Hitler Youth amongst the white water rafting crowed

peace out yo